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· 8d
How-to: If-then plans for the hour that is hardest for you
A plan made calmly is easier to keep when an urge is loud. An if-then plan decides in daylight what you will do at midnight. This how-to has two steps: find your hardest hour, then write a plan for it. Adapted from Map your hard hours and If-then plans in the Stillmonk Library.
Step one: find your hardest hour
For one week, each time an urge arrives, note three things: the time, the place and the feeling. The daily check-in is a good place to keep them. At the end of the week, look for the pattern. Late nights? Sunday afternoons? After a hard call?
Step two: write the plan
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Name the moment as exactly as you can: a time, a place, a feeling.
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Write it as an if. If I am in bed with my phone after eleven...
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Add one small, specific then. ...then I plug it in across the room.
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Make two more, short enough to remember when you are tired.
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Say them once each morning. You are rehearsing the choice ahead of time.
A few more examples
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If I feel restless on a Sunday afternoon, then I go outside for twenty minutes.
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If I come home after a hard day, then I eat something real before I sit down with my phone.
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If an urge arrives, then I open I feel an urge and choose one tool before I decide anything else.
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If I am still awake at midnight, then I get up and read in another room until I feel sleepy.
Keep it kind
A plan that does not work the first time is not a broken plan. Change the then, and try again. When a plan works, it is worth a line in Wins & Milestones.
Share one of yours in the replies if you like: someone else might borrow it.
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In for 4, hold for 4, out for 6. Stay with it while the urge softens.
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Kindness first
Speak to the feeling, not the method. Use Report if something feels off.
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